Fruit Solutions

What the hell is this?

Naturally, the labeling on the box is trying to advise the consumer that the contents is a solution, as in a chemical solution, which I suppose is true. But isn't the conventional name for a fruit-based chemical solution, simply "juice"? I had no idea MBAs were such big fans of the natural sciences.

I think "solutions" has to be the grand-daddy of business speak. Whereas most modern business speak started to swamp us about two years ago, I recall seeing the word solutions in use as far back as 1999.

Leverage

This is a term of physics. Here is a decent, if cursory, definition. It is an age-old concept. It means that you can move objects with only a fraction of the force that would be required by acting on them directly. The longer your lever, and the closer the fulcrum is to the object (further away from you) the more leverage you have.

Leverage is not a verb.

If you are an MBA and you are adding value to initiatives to sell innovative solutions for the new paradigm, leverage is not a word in your vocabulary. You do not know what it means. Don't use words when you don't know what they mean, you will get us all in trouble.

Mission Statement

I'm going to record some of the horrendous abuses of my favourite language, English, to which I am exposed, against my will, on a more or less daily basis. I work in an office tower, in a cubicle. Precisely what the company does or makes is of no relevance: there are managers and salespeople around. And when they open their mouths, what comes out is invariably Business Speak. If you don't know what I mean by Business Speak you soon will.

The other contributors to this blog, having been exposed to excessive amounts of Business Speak during one or more crucial formative/developmental periods of life (one must assume), are able to speak it fluently. It flows from their mouths like raw, incomprehensible sewage. So I cannot predict what their posts will be like.